There have been many instances in my life where I find myself disliking my situation. The situation could be something like my physical appearance or maybe something in regards to an external factor that is taking up my time and concentration. It is the invisible confines that keep me up at night, but I have the power to control it. Sometimes, every so often I need to find change to keep my mind fresh and new goals in sight. I never want to be comfortable, because comfortability implies there is no change on my part.
How many times have you ever found yourself disliking how you look in a t-shirt or clothes? I assure you most of the time it is in your head. The other day I put on my shirt and I did not like the way I looked in it. I was taken back a bit, because I never really have a problem with how I perceive myself physically. I am in pretty good physical shape, but I am not "competition ready". I do not really have a problem with how I perceive myself when I look in the mirror. I feel like I am past that stage in my life where I am worried about what others think. However, it happened, I disliked what I saw in the mirror.
I was confused on how I perceived myself in the mirror, because it is a shirt that I have worn before and I never had a problem with how I looked. I checked different angles in the mirror and turned the light on and off; I even opened and closed the blinds for the natural lighting effect. I do some bodybuilding so I know lights and angles make a difference in one's perceivable appearance. Anyway, as I was checking myself in the mirror I caught myself and I realized what I was doing was a bit out of my character. Here is the thing, my wardrobe is very limited in fashion. I do not really care too much about fashion nor what people think of my fashion sense. I am about comfort and wearing cool music band t-shirts [not serious, but I am]. I literally have six of the same type of t-shirts and five of the same type of cargo shorts. So it looks like I wear the same thing everyday, but I just have a preference. I do not like getting dressed up with the coolest brands or anything like that. Simple is better for me.
So I was a bit confused why I was starting to get into my head about my appearance. I stopped worrying about how I perceived myself in the mirror and started my day. I was still a little bothered about why I was perceiving my appearance that way so I grabbed my journal and started writing my thoughts. Looking back at my notes in my journal from days before, I saw my business strategy and research plan in launching the fitness division of my business, Rooted Kingdom. One of my notes was in research on social media marketing. Specifically, I was using Instagram for my research on fitness. I had a fitness instagram account once that did fairly well in promoting my sponsors and my brand, but I had since deleted it. I will get into why I deleted it in another blog. The fitness industry is constantly changing, so my knowledge on fitness marketing is outdated. During my research I saw many of the same type of photos depicting men and women using the best poses and lighting to their advantage. It is basically a highlight reel of one's physical self. It was apparent the men and women were in very good physical shape.
I realized that I had been comparing myself to the people that I have seen on instagram. When I came to this realization and I was able to get my mind back to where it should be, I was no longer comparing myself to those on social media depicting the highlight reel of themselves. It was amazing how spending some time on social media had influenced my self-esteem and how I perceived my physical body. I would like to note that there are instagram accounts out there that portray unedited photos, however most of the time there is editing involved.
Now that I have my mind right and I am reminded that everything I see, in the mirror or in social media, is not real per se, but it is a perception. If I do not like what I see in the mirror, without having any external influences, then I should change it. There are many things I can do to tighten up my body and to be more physically healthy. I can change/manipulate my current nutritional intake and I can do more physical activity. I have learned from experience that creating a nutrition plan and physical fitness plan will help me stay on track . Something about doing the hard work in terms of health and fitness has always made me feel empowered. I am ready to do the hard work and live a healthy life in mind, body, and spirit. Perception of Self.